REGRETS, DAD

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02/02/1915-04/09/2004

I'm sorry, more I didn't care.
I had the chance while you were here.
It's just that I was unaware.
I never saw you shed a tear.

I didn't know you had been hurt.
You always seemed all right to me.
But when you said, "I feel like dirt."
I sensed a pain I couldn't see.

Too late I learned you felt no good.
I cursed the ones who told you so.
They stopped you being what you could
And thus gave you nowhere to go.

That left a hole for you inside,
A wound for life to feel alone
Because someone could not abide
A sin for which you should atone.

Despite your wound you handled well
All obligations that you bore.
You cared for me, that I could tell.
I now know why there wasn't more.

Had you told me what I know now
I could have tried to make amends.
To you I would have made a bow.
We would have been much more than friends.

I washed you, dressed you, helped you shave.
When we went out I helped you walk.
I set you in the tub to bathe.
But through it all we didn't talk.

I'm sad you thought I seemed so cold,
That I told you by being gruff
Your effort even to grow old
I felt was never good enough.

If I could do it all again
I'd hug you at least twice a day.
I would try more to ease your pain.
"I love you", is the least I'd say.

When I recall your final night
We're holding hands, for that I am glad;
And many times to aid your 'flight'
I said, "You did a great job Dad."